Solitary Spiritualist versus Anti-social

[xakara]

First Sunday Setup: Clean more. Write more. Okay, on to the topic at hand. 

I don't like people. There are individuals I love, but I don't like people. When you get enough individuals collected they become folks. You all are folks. But we've been over this before, I'm just catching up the new readers. Yes, there are new readers, didn't you notice? I've graduated from four to a whole six, it was a big moment! So now that the new ones are caught up, let's get to the solitary vs. anti-social segment of our ramble. 

There's a magic chat over at  moondancerdrake's Dreamtime journal and I felt compelled to share my own current head-drama on spiritualism. It's short for me, so no worries. I'll expand another time when I'm a little less distracted. Onward...

I'm solitary in part because I'm the only Gaian I know. As many pagan, and all earth based religions touch on Gaia (yeah, some of you thought all pagan religions were earth based didn't you?), I could technically graft on to the Wiccan, Shaman, Dianic and even Druidic groupings I can find. But none of them are Gaian. 

I can find several environmentalist and political activist that are part of the Gaia Movement and prescribe to the Gaian Theory, but those I've met aren't openly pagan. They prefer to focus on the science of the theory rather than its "New Age" applications.

Being antisocial means I don't mind being in solitary practice. But lately I've been distracted by an internal nudge to CONVERT THE MASSES, sorry, pay my inner benevolent dictator no mind, I was going to say, talk to others about my beliefs. Primarily this is coming from the fact that like most folks, I've created belief systems in my writing worlds that touch on things I believe, or have learned, or that came to me with such completeness that they deserved their own universe to thrive in. As I craft the culture of my Therians it leaves me wanting to speak about the things that influenced it. 

As I'll be speaking to non-Gaians I haven't decided the extent to which I want to converse. It's not like I want to convert people (regardless of my IBD). I don't care what you all believe, as long as you aren't hurting yourselves or others, it's all rainbows in my world. So it's not a monologue I'm seeking where everyone nods placidly and goes off to do what I said, (Although those willing to go off and do what I say should email me cuz I have some stuff that needs to get done.), it's a dialogue of beliefs and paths and otherness of those out there I think I'm looking for. 

Or maybe I want to start a cult. Who knows, it's hard to tell when my bloodsugar is low and pms is gearing up. 

Anyway, having gotten that out of my head I'm feeling better. I know that you all didn't quite follow it, but you kinda expected that coming in.  It's just the way of this rambly mansion of my mind. 

Solitary-Antisocial-Spiritual Nudge-Cult-Ramble Done

~X


 

Comments

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

I'm solitary in part because I'm the only Gaian I know.

Um....what?

[xakara.livejournal.com]

I forgotten that I'd seduced you, conversed with you about that. :)

I meant in my area. I can edit it so it's clearer if you like. (http://photobucket.com)

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

I had thought there was the possibility you were speaking of knowing on a personal level, cuz I'm in the same position.

But I couldn't help but ask for clarification. :D

[xakara.livejournal.com]

No, no, I was speaking of locale, as that dictates personal solitary choices.

As far as a sense of community, no I'm not alone and very much count you as one I know. Swearsies!

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

I like swearsies. Swearsies works. *insert smilie face here, which LJ in its stupidity doesn't have available*

[xakara.livejournal.com]

Yeah, my photobucket account gets quite the workout since LJ doesn't have any available. But hey, this way I can insert my own.

So when I'm feeling like this (http://photobucket.com)

Or need this (http://photobucket.com)

I can show it without restraint.

~X

Poly (http://photobucket.com) is Love

[ameliajune.livejournal.com]

So check this out--I'm a therapist in my day job and I hate people too! LOL, my friends always look at me like I'm nuts when I say that. But it isn't any one person in particular, just "people." They irritate me :)

I've had a lot of struggle with solitary vs. joining a coven/whateva, myself. I find I put together a bunch of traditions for my own spirituality rather than subscribing to "one true way." I think part of me doesn't want to explain that to some uptight . I don't want to be told "you're doing it wrong" when I've only recently figured out what is right for me.

Also I'm really shy, and the idea of chanting or dancing near others is totally not exciting. I'm pretty quiet during my own rituals, preferring to talk to the Goddess in my head (mostly I use meditation).

BUT, I'd really love to share ideas and bounce thoughts off of others, too, so I feel I'm in that catch 22 place. I don't want to wind up isolated and non-objective about my practice, either.

So, I guess what I'm saying is yeah, I get it :)

[xakara.livejournal.com]

See, I knew other folks would get it. People, as a collective are rather depressive and irritating. It is only the efforts of individuals that allow one to see the collective worth of humanity.

On the solitary choice, I see where shyness would be a direct deterrent. I'm quieter in my own practice and more likely to find my most perfect moment in utter silence or soft singing.

But I'm fortunate in that I don't posses the shy gene. I openly appreciate the energy drawn up on groups even if it's not accessed in the same way I'd do it alone. So that makes me inclined to join in once a year or so when invited.

Right now however, I don't think I'm drawn to share ritual so much as thoughts, information, dreams, beliefs; just a general open exchange.

Hmm...an LJ community could work. At least there'd be two or three of you around so I wasn't talking to myself. ;)

~X

[moondancerdrake.livejournal.com]

Well far as I know I am the only Dianic in Milwaukee, and I have even tried getting goddess centered group going here with a lot of "Oh that sounds cool." but no one getting off their couches to show up. So I get ya. With gas prices what they are and rising, its going to become harder and harder to make trip up to madison, and I'm really not looking forward to going back to being solitary. Even though, yeah, people in general suck.

[xakara.livejournal.com]

I've met three other people who identified as Dianic in the city, so there are more of you here. There used to be a private co-ed Dianic group here, their co-leader was the first person I ever met who was Dianic. But I haven't been in the same social circles in so long that I haven't seen him or his friends in a while.

You know how I feel about the "Oh cool" response when trying to motivate others so I won't go into here.

I think you have the chance to create a group but only if you build it a person at a time and others are brought in by direct recommendation. It's the only way to avoid the curious but uncommitted that always want to talk but not do anything.

[busy91.livejournal.com]

I am not a fan of people either. I do not socialize. If it is outside of my comfort group, which is about 3 people, and not at the same time, I can't deal.

As far as being you being Gaian (and I have no idea what that is) that's cool. I had been studing the Pagan path for a long time, I don't consider myself a Pagan anymore though. However, I like to learn about all paths, so if you want to share it here, feel free, I'd read it.

[xakara.livejournal.com]

Good to know that when the urge to ramble about on the subject strikes, I'll have somebody "listening".

Don't think I'll need to ramble soon however, this was close enough to last me a while. :)

[busy91.livejournal.com]

OK so I just read the wiki pages you linked. Very interesting. I guess it isn't really Pagan but more spiritual. Learn something new every day.

[dracschick.livejournal.com]

good luck with your writing!

It's been nice getting to know you:)

*hugs*
Chris

[xakara.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :)

Um, are we breaking up? Or am I going somewhere?

Or am I misreading the "It's been nice getting to know you"?

Nope.......

[dracschick.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry. I just meant it as a general statement. I do enjoy reading your blog:)

Re: Nope.......

[xakara.livejournal.com]

Don't be sorry, it was all me, that's why I checked. When I'm tired I can't always be sure I'm taking in text the way it was meant. ;)

Thanks for letting me know you enjoy the blog.

Not liking people

[(Anonymous)]

But people like you! If you start a cult, can I join?

Nicholas

http://agentlemansdomain.typepad.com

Re: Not liking people

[xakara.livejournal.com]

Yes, should I feel the need to start one, you are definitely invited to join. :)